Is Marriage Obsolete Or Just Misunderstood?

Is Marriage Obsolete or Just Misunderstood?
A recent Pew Research Center study indicates Americans think marriage is obsolete. So, where does that leave Lutherans?
What with gay marriage, single parenthood, “just living together” and soaring divorce rates, it’s little wonder that 40 percent of Americans think that marriage is obsolete. Most Americans no longer think marriage is necessary for having sex (60 percent believe it’s morally acceptable to have sex before marriage). Or necessary for living together (55 percent). Or for having children (53 percent).
So, why get married at all? The Pew Research Center, the source of these statistics, notes further that marriage rates are going down. In 1960, 72 percent of American adults were married; today, not quite half are married. In 1960, 68 percent of young adults in their 20s were married; today, that percentage is only 26 percent.
These findings reflect not just the new ideas and swinging behavior of the culturally elite. They apply specifically to ordinary Americans. Actually, the Pew study finds that college graduates and people with higher incomes marry at a much higher rate (64 percent) than those with just a high school education (48 percent). So, where does that leave Christians?
One problem may be that few people have a good understanding of what marriage even is. Perhaps the most common assumption today is that what makes a marriage is love, understood as a romantic attraction. When two people love each other, they get married. It follows, though, that if the feeling fades—if one spouse decides “I don’t love you anymore”—then there is no longer any basis for the marriage.
The next step is divorce. As some pastors can testify, some couples who insist on writing their own wedding vows want to replace “As long as we both shall live” with “As long as we both shall love.”
Notice the assumptions in the gay marriage debates. If marriage is based on nothing more than a romantic attraction—as both sides often assume—it’s hard to see why two people of the same sex who have a romantic attraction to each other shouldn’t get married. Also in play is the unromantic view that marriage is just a legal contract that gives certain rights and privileges, such as tax advantages, access to shared property and hospital visitation rights.
If that’s what marriage is, it’s hard to see why two people of the same sex shouldn’t get in on these benefits. It’s also hard to see why the government, which supervises contract laws, shouldn’t be able to just change those any way it pleases.
Click here to read the remainder of Dr. Gene Edward Veith’s article, which was originally published in and is reprinted here by permission of The Lutheran Witness.
Be Informed
Learn more about the LCMS’s rich history of being pro-life with Rev. Ken Schurb in a recent podcast.
Be Equipped
Education seems to be more of a battlefield than ever now with teachers, parents, administrators, and legislators all involved. But “With rare exceptions, it has always been true that the parents who conceive the child raise him the best. And throughout American history, it has been thought that the family is the cradle of good citizenship and therefore of free and just politics.” Dr. Larry Arnn of Hillsdale College offers insight into why a political battle is being waged over children’s intellectual pursuits.
Be Encouraged
“We have to rid ourselves of the idea of the ‘secular’ as some neutral category. It doesn’t exist. It’s a lie. The secular is the religious, and it’s a religion that opposes Jesus. Whether in schools, in TV, in social media, in any aspect of life, beware of the secular! Love Jesus instead. The religion that gives true hope, meaning, and purpose is the religion bought by Jesus’ blood and spoken from His lips, the religion written down by His apostles, the religion of reconciliation with our Creator by the cross of His Son, the religion we are convinced of by His Spirit, and this is the religion that is worthy of our entire lives, our eternal life.”
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Today’s reading is Luke 14:7-11 which says,
7 Now [Jesus] told a parable to those who were invited, when he noticed how they chose the places of honor, saying to them, 8 “When you are invited by someone to a wedding feast, do not sit down in a place of honor, lest someone more distinguished than you be invited by him, 9 and he who invited you both will come and say to you, ‘Give your place to this person,’ and then you will begin with shame to take the lowest place. 10 But when you are invited, go and sit in the lowest place, so that when your host comes, he may say to you, ‘Friend, move up higher.’ Then you will be honored in the presence of all who sit at table with you. 11 For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.”
Our Founding Fathers are indeed the fathers of all Americans. DEI taught us to despise them, to concentrate on their faults, to think of ourselves as somehow more enlightened. Critical theory is all about destruction, about seeing through something so that you can no longer see the thing itself. DEI is the philosophy of the scoff and sneer.
But as Americans, we do well to think on the God of providence and to celebrate this day with thanksgiving. Now, mind you, I honor all peoples as they sing their anthems, giving thanks for their own special heritage. But our heritage is a cornucopia, a legacy that we are called to live up to.
Today’s reading is Luke 13:23-27 and 30 which says,
23 Someone asked [Jesus], “Lord, are only a few people going to be saved?” He said to them, 24 “Make every effort to enter through the narrow door, because many, I tell you, will try to enter and will not be able to. 25 Once the owner of the house gets up and closes the door, you will stand outside knocking and pleading, ‘Sir, open the door for us.’ 27 “But he will answer, ‘I don’t know you or where you come from.’ 26 “Then you will say, ‘We ate and drank with you, and you taught in our streets.’ 27 “But he will reply, ‘I don’t know you or where you come from. Away from me, all you evildoers!’…30 Indeed there are those who are last who will be first, and first who will be last.”
475 years ago, Magdeburg, Germany, was under siege by her own emperor, Charles V. It was the last Lutheran city remaining in Germany only four years after the death of Martin Luther. At issue was the preaching of the Gospel and the administration of the Sacraments. The highest authority in the land was demanding that the city churches re-institute Roman worship practices.
The city officers faced a difficult choice. Should they abandon the scriptural doctrine and practice restored by the Lutheran Reformation? Or should they take up arms against the God-ordained temporal authority? The pastors and theologians of the city penned the Magdeburg Confession to instruct the city councilmen of their God-given duty.
The dates identifying the LCRL bulletin blurbs are only suggestions. Please feel free to use any and all of the bulletin blurbs as your ministry needs allow.
The Bulletin Insert is designed to be printed and cut in half to fit conveniently inside a Sunday worship bulletin. Each month an insert will offer insight, encouragement, and information from the LCRL on the topics of Religious Liberty, Life, Marriage, or Education.
Today’s reading is Luke 12:49-51, where Jesus says,
49 “I have come to bring fire on the earth, and how I wish it were already kindled! 50 But I have a baptism to undergo, and what constraint I am under until it is completed! 51 Do you think I came to bring peace on earth? No, I tell you, but division.
Two kinds of righteousness? I suppose, but not as it's often spoken about in our midst. There is civic righteous, which is to live in accordance with the natural law and may rightly describe the life of anyone, with or without Christ. Civil righteousness, reverence for life, for marriage, for the rights of property, and the like is a good thing. A Mormon may then live a life of civic righteousness, though he cannot be truly righteous or declared righteous.
We are told that the righteousness that comes from God is vertical and differs from all human righteousness. But such a notion needs to be challenged. The righteousness that we receive from God is, in fact, the righteousness lived on the horizontal plane. Many Christians think of righteousness as a gift from God that finds an opening in the cross of Christ. But that is misleading. The righteousness of God is, in fact, the righteousness of Christ, imputed to us because of Christ's active and passive obedience, even unto His death as a sacrifice for our sins. The likes of Forde and Paulson mislead, saying that Christ came forgiving, and for that He was murdered. By no means. Christ's forgiveness was made possible by the Father's sacrifice of His Son, as well as by Christ actually fulfilling, not putting an end to, the Law.
Today’s reading is Luke 12:22-23 and 29-31 where Jesus says,
Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. 23 For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes…. 29 And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink, nor be worried. 30 For all the nations of the world seek after these things, and your Father knows that you need them. 31 Instead, seek his kingdom, and these things will be added to you.”
Recently, one among us complained that the LCMS has more often taken positions on the Republican side of things, with nothing from the Democrat agenda. I wonder if such complaints, from an opposite point of view, are made in the ELCA. What of it? Among the so-called Republican views cited were articles on being pro-life and warning against the rainbow revolution and the trans crisis. But these are not positions based on politics, though politics matter as a matter of justice and protection, but are essential to our humanity. Those who favor abortion, gay marriage, and the transgender agenda are in fact at war with the God of Genesis, the Author of creation. About such things there should be no debate among us, for to deny male/female, to deny the child in the womb is to deny Christ, who Himself lived in the womb of Mary, reiterated the truth of creation (Matthew 19, Mark 10) and came to be the groom for His bride, the Church.
Today’s reading is Luke 12:13-15 which says,
13 Someone in the crowd said to [Jesus], “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.”14 Jesus replied, “Man, who appointed me a judge or an arbiter between you?” 15 Then he said to them, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions.”
English Statesman George Savile quipped, “Men are not hanged for stealing horses, but that horses would not be stolen.” With all that is happening in the world, his words concentrate our thoughts. Justice is not merely about trials and verdicts leading to punishment. It’s also about deterrence.
Through current events, many are relearning a seemingly long-forgotten factor relative to justice. As I watched the evening news with my wife, a segment came on about Venezuelan gang members being ordered back into the country after deportation. Without prompting, she asked, “What does it say when a federal judge orders the immediate return of violent criminals who’ve already been deported?”
Prayer Partner Thursday provides a month-long prayer emphasis in one of the four Lutheran Center for Religious Liberty areas of emphasis: Religious Liberty, Sanctity of Life, Educational Freedom, and Marriage as an Institution (family).
Today’s reading is Colossians 2:6-8, where the Bible says,
So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, 7 rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness. 8 See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the elemental spiritual forces of this world rather than on Christ.
The Bible is an earthy, fleshy book. God forms Adam from dirt. He fashions Eve from Adam’s rib. They eat forbidden fruit and use animal skin for covering. There are pillars of smoke and fire, roasted lambs and bitter herbs, bloody sacrifices and clouds of temple incense. And not only in the Old Testament — the New Testament continues with such physicality. Jesus heals with spit and dirt, fingers in ears, and caskets touched. A bloody cross culminates in bodily resurrection. Finally, He promises the resurrection of our bodies and a renewed physical earth.
Biblical salvation is not an offer to escape the body into some disembodied realm, whether platonic, gnostic, Eastern, transhumanist or anything else. Rather, the Bible deeply anchors redemption itself to the body. God carries out His redemptive deliverance through intense bodily realities from creation to consummation.
The Bulletin Insert is designed to be printed and cut in half to fit conveniently inside a Sunday worship bulletin. Each month an insert will offer insight, encouragement, and information from the LCRL on the topics of Religious Liberty, Life, Marriage, or Education.
The dates identifying the LCRL bulletin blurbs are only suggestions. Please feel free to use any and all of the bulletin blurbs as your ministry needs allow.
Today’s reading is Luke 10:38-42, where the Bible says,
As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. 39 She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. 40 But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”
41 “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “You are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”
Make no mistake, legal suicide corrupts. Corrupts doctors who have taken an oath to do no harm. Corrupts a medical system that comes to think of patients as costs. Corrupts sacred bonds of a family, and the ties that bind generations. The fact that we are so willing to kill an unborn child, the fact that Obama, when in the Illinois legislature, would not even vote to ban partial-birth abortion should tell us something. The weak and the vulnerable are found at life's beginning and end and then everywhere in between. Where there is not right or wrong, there is only power; where life is not held as precious, it becomes cheap.
That's the story of salvation. We are given a glimpse in Abraham's willingness to put Isaac on the altar. In a worldly way, we see it when parents send their sons off to war. But what of those parents who say, "I just want my child to be happy"? I think we all get it, though that can't be the end all. There has to be something more. The writer to the Hebrews tells us that Abraham knew that Isaac would live again, would rise from the dead. But then, don't we?
Today’s reading is Luke 10:30-37, where Jesus responds to the question, “Who is my neighbor?”
30 In reply Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. 31 A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. 32 So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. 33 But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. 34 He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. 35 The next day he took out two denariic and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’
36 “Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”
37 The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”
Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”
Today’s reading is Galatians 6:9-10, where the Bible says,
9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 10 Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.
It’s Friday, July 4th, 2025, in Washington D.C. and it has been an incredible journey. Our LCRL work started in 2017. From the start, our mission has been to bring a faithful two-kingdom voice into the heart of federal politics—a voice that limits the reach of government, defends the family and the Church, and upholds First Amendment freedoms so that God’s people can freely proclaim the whole counsel of God without fear of coercion or intervention to the contrary. For a time, threats like COVID shutdowns, the Obergefell decision, and the politicized coercion of DEI-LGBTQ mandates eroded those protections and weaponized government against those holding to traditional, biblical values.
Prayer Partner Thursday provides a month-long prayer emphasis in one of the four Lutheran Center for Religious Liberty areas of emphasis: Religious Liberty, Sanctity of Life, Educational Freedom, and Marriage as an Institution (family).
Today’s reading is Galatians 5:1, where the Bible says,
“It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.”
That's how Marxism works. In the Communist Manifesto, it's the freeman and slave, the patrician and the plebeian, lord and serf, guild-master and journeyman. Translated into the present, it's critical theory where it becomes a matter accumulating points. Score one for being a woman, one for being a person of color, one for being LGB, and perhaps two for being T. Count yourself as an enemy of the one percent, and that's at least a half-point. Such an odd thing, yet you gain a bit of oppressed status by including yourself among the 99 percent. Say you are an LGBTQ ally, another half point, and so on. Colleges have long operated this way, and many young people, young women especially, come home as trained Marxists.
Today’s reading is Galatians 3:26-29, where the Bible says,
26 So, in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, 27 for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. 28 There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. 29 If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham’s seed, and heirs according to the promise.
The Bulletin Insert is designed to be printed and cut in half to fit conveniently inside a Sunday worship bulletin. Each month an insert will offer insight, encouragement, and information from the LCRL on the topics of Religious Liberty, Life, Marriage, or Education.
The dates identifying the LCRL bulletin blurbs are only suggestions. Please feel free to use any and all of the bulletin blurbs as your ministry needs allow.
If a couple came to me and said, “Pastor, we’d like to get married, and we’d like to do everything we can today to make sure our marriage ends in divorce tomorrow,” then I would tell them that the first thing they should do is move in together. Cohabitation is that destructive to marriage and family life.
However, the warning must not stop there. Because it is a form of public and intentional sin, cohabitation is particularly destructive to the conscience, and not just to the couple’s conscience but also to the conscience of the Christian community. Many couples view their choices as going no further than themselves. I would like to challenge this by considering some of the ways that cohabitation harms the broader Christian community.